Whiny Wednesday

Does everyone else hate housework as much as I do? Does anyone hate housework but also hates having their house even the tiniest bit untidy? I know, I know, you can't be anal retentive about cleanliness if you refuse to clean. You say it's just not possible. I assure you that it IS possible.

I have dreams of my house being immaculate. A place for everything and everything in its place. Ohhhhh...I am sighing at the thought of it even as I write this. Now I won't get started on my home and its lack of decor, matching furniture and its general state of not being....well, finished. You work with what you've got, and what we've got is a lot compared to some families so I am certainly thankful. But I can't for the life of me begin to make my house look the way I want it to, even with the items we already have. Then on top of all that there's the cleaning. Well, I know I am not the only woman in the world who makes a good go of making sure their house is neat and tidy everyday. As we all know it rarely stays that way. Kids, spouses, the dust that refuses to remove itself from every teeny-tiny nook and cranny; all of these things refuse to keep your home looking the way you feel that it should be. It's an endless, vicious cycle.

You may be asking as I rant and rave: How do I want my house? Well....inviting, warm, kid-friendly, and just homey I guess. Do I dare say that I would like it to look like it came out of a Pottery Barn catalog? Well, maybe not just the Pottery Barn catalog...But I can never seem to get that overall feeling. I feel stuck. I feel stuck between my college apartment and my "adult home". It's decorating and financial purgatory. I am ready to finally take control over my own space and make it my own, but as a young mother in a young family the money just does not seem to trickle down to those needs--I mean, wants. I want to feel pride as I walk through my front door, not defeat. I'm not asking my house to be the envy of the neighborhood.

So what to do?

Give up....for now at least. I have chosen to keep my castle in the sky image of an immaculate adult home in my mind as I concede to the mismatched furniture, the toys that permeate every piece of floor space, the never-ending dust bunnies, crumbs, and piles of who-knows-what. I remind myself that I have a roof over my head and a happy, healthy, loving family and that I want to spend my time enjoying that family. Which makes my home a home--maybe not one from the Pottery Barn catalog or Martha Stewart Living, but that's okay. Is it wrong to envy Martha Stewart or the Pottery Barn catalogs and secretly dream that your home look exactly like the one in the pictures? No. Is it possible to have your home look like the one in the pictures? Sure, but do I really want to drive myself crazy over how clean my house is and whether or not I have the most admired furnishings? No. I'm busy enough as it is trying to keep my toddler alive on a daily basis, my guy happy and myself from imploding over what ever daily catastrophe has popped up. I mean it's not like my house is a deathtrap. At least the State hasn't deemed it as such---yet.

PS: If you're Josh and you're reading this---I LOVE YOU. My incoherent verbal diarrhea is in no way shape or form a criticism of you and your title as "The Provider". You work hard day in and day out to help this family succeed and "The Management" is most thankful and appreciative. If you have any complaints next week's Whiny Wednesday is reserved just for you.